Posts by Aiesha Harley

23

New Blood Card For Ex-Jw's - sign your today!

by ballistic in

jw
friends

.

as you know, the jws have a new blood card, so i thought it was important to remind you all to update your ex-jw one right away!.

tee hee

Aiesha Harley

Fantastic ballistic !

36

Why do churches still make me panic ?

by Aiesha Harley in

jw
friends

i'm really glad i've found this site a week ago.

reading some of the stories and comments on here has really helped.

there are so many out there who's lives have been ruined by the so-called truth.. i was brought up in the truth as an elders daughter, youngest of 5, a brother and sister had been disfellowshiped, other brother had left as a teenager and my other sister is still sitting on the fence aged 40 going on 15, if she'd made a decision instead of sitting on the fence i'm convinced she wouldn't be the alcoholic mess she is today!

Aiesha Harley

By the way, come someone please tell me what this dub business is all abouty? I've never heard it before.

36

Why do churches still make me panic ?

by Aiesha Harley in

jw
friends

i'm really glad i've found this site a week ago.

reading some of the stories and comments on here has really helped.

there are so many out there who's lives have been ruined by the so-called truth.. i was brought up in the truth as an elders daughter, youngest of 5, a brother and sister had been disfellowshiped, other brother had left as a teenager and my other sister is still sitting on the fence aged 40 going on 15, if she'd made a decision instead of sitting on the fence i'm convinced she wouldn't be the alcoholic mess she is today!

Aiesha Harley

Hi all

Am back again. It takes a while to respond as I don't have my own computer yet so bear with me if I don't respond straight away.

Codeblue i'll definitely be looking out for the book you mentioned in the bookshops, if anyone else has other recommendations they'd be much appreciated.

Ferret, the same thing happened at my father's cremation. Just as I was coming to think that JWs weren't soooo bad, the elder conducting the talk spent a large portion with remarks blatantly directed at myself, my two brothers and my sister and their respective families. Then a friend of my father's approached me after the cremation and intimated that i should take not of the elder's 'thought provoking' words. I refuse to even pass the time of day with this man now if he's there when i visit my mum - how insensitive to say things like that when you're trying to wrestle with your own feeling of bitterness, anger and obvious love that you have for a misguided father who thought he was doing his best for his family but spent more time 'shepherding the flock' and making himself ill in the process than paying his own family attention.

Oo think I've been ranting a bit too long now.

Thank you all for your kind words. I'm not looking to join any new faith of any kind, i'm just developing an interest in what else is out there, i don't even know what i think about there being a god. It'll take time.

I'm always happy to chat to people who are perhaps struggling themselves and need someone to talk to, i'm a very good listener and have no intention of telling people what they should do, after experiencing that for so long i'm very much an advocate of finding your own way without being bullied by people who have obviously been blinded by lies.

36

Why do churches still make me panic ?

by Aiesha Harley in

jw
friends

i'm really glad i've found this site a week ago.

reading some of the stories and comments on here has really helped.

there are so many out there who's lives have been ruined by the so-called truth.. i was brought up in the truth as an elders daughter, youngest of 5, a brother and sister had been disfellowshiped, other brother had left as a teenager and my other sister is still sitting on the fence aged 40 going on 15, if she'd made a decision instead of sitting on the fence i'm convinced she wouldn't be the alcoholic mess she is today!

Aiesha Harley

Wow, I wasn't expecting any replies, just goes to show there are friends out there.

Thanks to Dansk for your kind words - i've seen some of your other posts and understand you've been through an incredibly tough time, I hope you're feeling better and that your other daughter has seen sensed and got back in contact.

Thanks also to Ned (completely agree) and Forscher for comments too.

I only go into churches when my friends are getting married, though have also been to a couple of funerals (and a JW funeral for my dad 3 years ago which completely freaked me out!).

I guess after years of being told what to think and believe and then a few more years of trying to work out my place in the big wide world I'm starting to realise that the blinkers need to come off - I don't want to rush things and it'll be a very very long time before i down the route of working out what i believe.

It's so nice to know that there are people on this site who care about others and know the true meaning of unconditional love and respect.

11

Desperately seeking.....

by jack w in

this is a great site.

i have lurked for a while as a guest though.. i am still "in' you might say.

out mentally, but somewhat 'in' physically.

Aiesha Harley

Hi Jack w

Welcome to the world of posting, I'm now on my 2nd response ever and am enjoying dipping my toe into the big ocean of what i think will be a big part of the next chapter of my life, finally finding people who have been in similar situations as myself.

If you like this lady in question, and you really want another JW relationship then by all means ask her out, she can only say yes or no. Just be careful, my sister got talking to a chap in the congregation years ago and as soon as the elders saw they practically tried to arrange a marriage !

Don't be afraid to ask a girlie out - we're not all scary monsters, some of us are quite sane, despite our bizarre upbringings, and if she's a nice person she'll accept a coffee and she'll be honest about whether she wants more than friendship.

Good luck and feel free to chat.

36

Why do churches still make me panic ?

by Aiesha Harley in

jw
friends

i'm really glad i've found this site a week ago.

reading some of the stories and comments on here has really helped.

there are so many out there who's lives have been ruined by the so-called truth.. i was brought up in the truth as an elders daughter, youngest of 5, a brother and sister had been disfellowshiped, other brother had left as a teenager and my other sister is still sitting on the fence aged 40 going on 15, if she'd made a decision instead of sitting on the fence i'm convinced she wouldn't be the alcoholic mess she is today!

Aiesha Harley

Hi there

I'm really glad i've found this site a week ago. Reading some of the stories and comments on here has really helped. There are so many out there who's lives have been ruined by the so-called truth.

I was brought up in the truth as an elders daughter, youngest of 5, a brother and sister had been disfellowshiped, other brother had left as a teenager and my other sister is still sitting on the fence aged 40 going on 15, if she'd made a decision instead of sitting on the fence I'm convinced she wouldn't be the alcoholic mess she is today! As the youngest child still in the truth, my parents clung onto the fact that I was the only one who would be saved at armageddon. It's not nice to have your dad sitting on your bed crying every night because you've told him you don't want to go to the meetings anymore. Emotional pressure is so unfair and i still feel incredibly bitter about that whole time in my life.

Anyway, I'd like to know if churches send anyone else into a blind panic? I think for me, it's actually being inside and seeing altars. Since the age of 17 when I left WTS, everytime i go into a church I shake uncontrollably and only now at the age of 31 I don't cry. It's not so much a fear of being struck down by lightening, I think it's more the fact that the whole religion thing, no matter what religion or church, makes me really panicky and has made me afraid to even talk to others about their beliefs for fear of being dragged into another cult. It took me 5 years to finally pluck up the courage to leave the last one!

I find it really hard to talk about life in the truth to people who haven't experienced it. To begin with I felt so bitter and it painful to talk about. Now I feel like i'm being over dramatic, surely it couldn't have been that bad compared to what people caught up in wars go through is it?

I'm starting to open my mind to other beliefs, but still panic when I'm in churches. Does anyone else experience the same thing?

17

WT elder school Pittsburg PA in Jan 1970

by james_woods in

have been gone from the board for a month or so, but i have read with great interest some of the stories about very recent "elder" schools from actual attendees.

i thought some might like to know about my experience in one of these in the very early 70's.

i was pioneering where the need was great (clinton, okla.) and was made assistant cong.

Aiesha Harley

Thanks Serendipity

17

WT elder school Pittsburg PA in Jan 1970

by james_woods in

have been gone from the board for a month or so, but i have read with great interest some of the stories about very recent "elder" schools from actual attendees.

i thought some might like to know about my experience in one of these in the very early 70's.

i was pioneering where the need was great (clinton, okla.) and was made assistant cong.

Aiesha Harley

Sorry back again...am struggling with my boyfriends laptop marvellous.

Anyway, just wanted to say this is the first time I've had the guts to google search on Jehovah's Witnesses and laughed my head off when I found this site - why did it take me so long to do this (apart from not having my own computer of course).

I was brought up in "the truth" as an elder's daughter who being the oldest youngster in the congregation had to be an exemplary youth - well in a way I was as as soon as I left so did others !

James I'm intrigued by what you said about Russell's grave and the pyramid? By some bizarre co-incidence I'm reading a book called Angels and Demons which is a prequel to The Da Vinci code by Dan Brown which is talking about pyramids of light etc and links to Catholocism, this wouldn't be the same thing would it?

I'd be interested to hear from anyone who's read these books as well.

Thanks for listening - I'm definitely going to keep logging in, it's great to know this is available to those who are really struggling.

17

WT elder school Pittsburg PA in Jan 1970

by james_woods in

have been gone from the board for a month or so, but i have read with great interest some of the stories about very recent "elder" schools from actual attendees.

i thought some might like to know about my experience in one of these in the very early 70's.

i was pioneering where the need was great (clinton, okla.) and was made assistant cong.

Aiesha Harley

Hi James (and everyone else replying).

17

WT elder school Pittsburg PA in Jan 1970

by james_woods in

have been gone from the board for a month or so, but i have read with great interest some of the stories about very recent "elder" schools from actual attendees.

i thought some might like to know about my experience in one of these in the very early 70's.

i was pioneering where the need was great (clinton, okla.) and was made assistant cong.

Aiesha Harley

Hi James (and everyone else replying).